The Natatorium

An emporium of oddities from around the world, complete with somewhat informative plaques that almost never match the item they are meant to be describing.

Monday, August 09, 2004

Stepford Wedding

This weekend was Jessica's wedding. Thursday night was the bacelorette party, Friday night was the rehersal dinner, and Saturday was the wedding. I was one of five Bridesmaids, whose company I was in for about 48 hours, with a short break between hour 10 and hour 22.

Anyway, it was fun. Except for the hide-a-bed from hell. But I'll get to that.

We all wore strapless knee-length pink dresses with pearl necklaces and earrings (except me, who doesn't have pierced ears) and had our hair straightened and half-pulled back. The resulting effect was that we looked like an army of Stepford Wives. Which was fine. Everyone said I looked beautiful, but I had on eyeliner and stuff, so it definitely wasn't a look I'd choose for myself.

On Friday, after sleeping in my own bed the previous night, I drove into Branson with another Springfieldian bridesmaid and we attended the rehearsal dinner, where I got to talk to an old friend that I hadn't seen in years--the bride's brother. He was a little different, and we didn't have the old chemistry, but that was a good thing since he's married now. Later that night, we all (bride and bridesmaids) drove back into Springfield and stayed in a hotel so we could all get up early and go to the Salon together. Four of the girls got to stay on cushy beds, but me and the bride's sister-in-law got the pull-out hide-a-bed... and well, lets just say that I've been more comfortable sleeping on a gravel bar in a sleeping bag. The mattress was so horrible that I could feel every individual spring digging into my flesh--but that wasn't the fun part. The head of the bed didn't come up all the way, so it was still sloped down towards the floor, the other girl and I were basically draped over this terrible metal bar that we could distinctly "feel" through the mattress. I seriously almost laughed when I first got on the bed, it was just so ridiculous. I seriously thought I was in a Ben Stiller movie.

The other girl and I eventually moved the mattress off the bedframe and onto the floor, but that wasn't much better. The jabbing metal bar and sloping head were gone, but I could still feel every spring. Jeez.

After a sleepless night, we all got up at 6:45 to get ready and be at the Salon by 8:00. I had the worst stylist in the world. She was supposed to straighten my hair, but all she did was make it stiff and frizzy. I won't even discuss the makeup she put on me. I almost hyperventilated. Suffice it to say, I payed this old woman $45 to make me look good for the wedding, and she made me look like a clown. When we got to the church, the other girls fixed me and made me look awesome in about 15 minutes. Stupid old people.

The wedding was beautiful; did I mention that the bride and one of her bridesmaids were models? Yes, she was gorgeous. The whole thing went off without a hitch, with the exception of the bride and groom getting, er, hitched.

Good things that came out of this weekend: I got to know one of the bride's friends whom I have a lot in common with, and hopefully we'll meet up for coffee and discussion. She's a few years older than me, but that's great, because she can give me advice on college, grad school, and careers.

I also got to see an amazing pianist. One of the groom's friends was an older man who sat down at the church's grande piano and busted out with some incredible baroque, classical, and jazz. I almost drooled.

Not much more to report I suppose, except that I'm getting quite annoyed with the childish actions (or lack thereof) of a certain guy. Puh. NO ONE ignores me...

I'm meeting an old friend for lunch today. Hopefully that will go well. I have more exciting things to report, so stay tuned. Same Nat time, same Nat URL.


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