*laughs hysterically* So we had one of those "follow-your-dreams-don't-do-drugs" assemblies, and I swear, it was just like "Jim Cunningham, 2003!!!" (for those of you familiar with the cult-hit Donnie Darko). Or maybe that one episode of Clone High (GREAT SHOW) where the marketers for some "X-treme" new "Energy Booster Food" (made of pancake batter and blue food coloring) put on an assembly involving motocross jumping, flashing lights, and Jock Jams, not to mention screaming and ultra-cool sunglasses.

They were seriously throwing everything they had at us. They had loud rock music. They had motorcycles. They had people screaming, jumping, falling down, acting like idiots. I felt really bad for them, because they try so hard, when they don't realize that no 15-18 year old with even a smidgen of intellectual teenage angst is going to be influence by an assembly they are forced to attend, especially if the assembly is "happy" and positively *desperate* to be cool. People's opinions are changed by truth. They are changed by emotion. They are changed by love, fear, determination. They are not changed by 20-somethings in neon green tee-shirts running around screaming. And that's just for people in general. Teenagers are rarely changed by anything less than a mind-bending, soul-shattering, life-changing experience.

[finis rant]

In other news, I have homework. Bye.