The Natatorium

An emporium of oddities from around the world, complete with somewhat informative plaques that almost never match the item they are meant to be describing.

Thursday, July 31, 2003

::takes deep breath:: Ahhhhh, smell that? That's the delicious scent of intelligent, angst-ridden, depressed teenagers. Er, not really delicious, I guess... I mean, I love them, but I wish they weren't depressed. That's not good. Depression sucks, but it's not as bad as schitzophrenia. That's some bad $|-|17 right there. But yes, anyway, as I was saying, I'm currently surrounded by intelligent, depressed teenagers. Which is fine with me, I prefer them to stupid happy teenagers, but it would be nice to meet a *happy* *intelligent* teenager. These are quite scarce, though, most of the time. The reason is quite obvious. Intelligence=disillusionment=disenchantment=reality realization=depression. As my mom put it, "Anyone who's smart, especially in their teen years, starts to think about things. And in this world, anyone who really thinks about things, especially a teenager, is going to get depressed."

So this post isn't really accurately expressing what I want it to. What I'm really trying to say is, I'm surrounded by awesome people who are in a dark place, and that makes me sad because I want them to be happy. I sound really dumb now, but I'm just trying to say I'm going to do my best in this position I've been put in; I'm going to try my hardest to do what I can by my fellow "gifted"s, soulmates, and old friends. I'm going to do my best.

Wednesday, July 30, 2003

So I'm learning that sometimes you just have to put up with other people's crap, especially if you love them. Sometimes you just have to let yourself get screwed over. And sometimes, once in a while, you have to suck it up and be a friend to someone you really don't like, or who's hurt you in the past, because they need a friend and it's the right thing to do. And yet, I'm always told that being a doormat is a bad thing, and you can't let people walk all over you all the time. So where's the line? Is there a line? How do I walk it? All questions that remain unanswered tonight. But I think for now, I'll just feel my way through it. Or die trying. =P

Saturday, July 26, 2003

"Love never fails. But where there are prophesies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reason like a child. When I became an adult, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love."

--I Corinthians 13:8-13

My friend and I are just alike only flipped.
Everyone in this town knows everyone else, it seems. Only it's so vague you'd never know it. 6 degrees of separation.
Connection is everything. Look for it, learn from it.

Thursday, July 24, 2003

Hey! I added links on the side! Check them out!

Tuesday, July 22, 2003

Heee hee... found some funny web toon links for you:

And of course, the good old standbys:


I love it when I visit my own blog as though expecting it to be updated.

Ah, the inexperienced web-creationist, not yet accustomed to being the updat-er when she is so used to being the one who seeks out and absorbs the updates of others... she has not truly realized her full power as a creator of web-material... how she can cause her loyal fans to hold their collective breaths and wait, unmoving, for the next pearls of insight to drop from her fingers, onto the keyboard, through the internet cable and off into infinite cyberspace.

Either that, or no one reads this frickin' thing.

Ah, well let me have my dellusions. Or, give me a reality check and let me know how many people actually see this! If you read this, drop me a line at

Blog census! Yay!!!

Sunday, July 20, 2003

Yay for Laura, who got me and Josh into a movie cheap! Yay for chocolate milk shakes! Yay for cool cops! Yay for summer!

Boo to work.

Friday, July 18, 2003

Oh yeah. I wrote a song about Abortion. The lyrics run thus:

Liza Jane Lyrics

Chorus: Where have you gone
Little Liza Jane
Your voice shook the nations
Long before you came

You had so much to sing about
You had so much to give
It’s too bad you never got
The chance to live

Verse: From ancient times to present
Our story stays the same
We sacrifice our children
To the ever burning flame

We came here lookin’ for freedom
But got lost along the way
Our friends all turn to ashes now
I guess that’s the price you pay

Repeat Chorus

Verse: We want so bad to do what’s right
But don’t know where to begin
When human life is the price of the fight
What’s compassion, and what is sin?

So we make our hearts the battlegrounds
And our bodies the bargaining chips
We throw away what’s priceless
And through our very soul it rips

Repeat Chorus

Bridge: As the darkness blooms
Unrecognized by men
A little spark is growing
And a new light shines within

Final Chorus: So say goodbye to the future
Say goodbye to the past
My only hope and prayer for you
Is that you will find peace at last

Yeah, unlike *some* people who say they "wrote a song" when all they wrote was *lyrics*, I actually wrote a playable/singable tune, including accompainiment as well. So it really is a song.



Dude. Like, totally. (Profound, huh?) ;) Oh, all y'all need to mosey on over to , especially you, Laura. We're talking some goooood webcomics. Oh yeah. Already wasted about 3 hours of my life on it this week. ;) Yay for wastful distractions! (And the peasants rejoice!!!)

Thursday, July 10, 2003

Intellectual conversations are so rare and beautiful. It's great to connect with someone you just met on a deeper level, especially if they recognize and can add to your sentiments. Religion seems to be the most common topic, especially how hypocritical people can be about it without even realizing it. For instance, it's perfectly acceptable for a non-Christian to tell a Christian that they're wrong, but offensive for the situation to be reversed. And when you're talking about beliefs, *everything* is offensive unless you preface it with the obligatory phrase, "I believe..." or "According to my religion..." or "[insert religion] says..." And yet, whenever you're talking about beliefs, if you're not in agreement with someone else, aren't you *saying* they're wrong anyway? For instance, if you are agnostic and talking with a Christian, and you say "I don't believe that", isn't that as good as saying that the Christian is wrong? And if the Christian says to the agnostic, "I don't believe that", it's somehow less offensive than if the Christian were to outwardly say "You are wrong" rather than "My beliefs state that you are wrong." It's almost like shoving the offense over to the entity named "belief" where it can be neutralized, since no one can be angry or offended by this intangible, abstract concept named "belief". Who is "belief" and why are we so apt to shove the responsibility of telling the unpleasant truth to her, forcing her to stand up for herself rather than us doing it for her? When we don't stand up for our "belief" to avoid unpleasantries and offenses, we become an observer on the sidelines rather than someone actually claiming possession of her. We distance ourself from "Belief", making her a concept, an idea, one that can be easily and courteously ignored or disregarded. It is when we truly claim our "Belief" and personify them in ourselves; when we say not "I belive this is true" but "This *is* true!" that we are in fact owning our beliefs and making them real within us. Unfortunately, this is also the point at which we become truly, disgustingly offensive to atheists, agnostics, wiccans, and anyone else with a dissenting opinion (and doubtless a long history of bitterness towards Christians, who tend to not make themselves the most likeable people sometimes). I suppose what I'm saying is, when you use the phrase "I believe" before stating your case, instead of speaking as though it is the unequivocal truth, you are disclaiming your own beliefs, and stealing their validity. This, in turn, offends others because you are blatantly stating their incorrectness; but isn't it already implied by your dissent? The language we use is often laden with subterfuge we had never considered, and what keeps us from saying what we mean is our fear of being impolite, which only reflects badly on us and our religion. Thus, we arrive at a paradox: Use pleasant language that detracts from the validity and credibility of what you believe, or present your beliefs in their true, pure form and risk alienating the other party. What can we do to escape this paradox? Understand it. Recognize that the other party is in the same boat as you; that is, probably do not want to offend you but feel the need to express the truthfullness that they *do* believe what they believe. Don't get offended at choice of words or modes of language. Recognize that when someone believes something, they'll state it as a truth, and you have a right to do the same. Don't get angry. Seriously. Anger in a religious discussion is entirely counterproductive. Look for understanding, and discuss the concepts as though they were real (since they are) and not some line of text in a book. Go forth and progress.

Was that preachy enough for you? Sorry, but when I get going, it's hard to stop. This truth was illuminated to me today and caught me by surprise, I had to exercise as many concepts and lessons from it as possible; though I do still believe in the validity of the above statement. Think about it and try it in your next discussion, just make sure the other party knows that your intention is not to offend, but effectively communicate. The hardest part is to keep your cool. ;)

Wednesday, July 09, 2003

Hey! What do you know, I'm eighteen now. Wow. I can do anything... pretty much.... except drink and drive and rental car... So. This means I can do all sorts of things I couldn't do before. Like smoke, strip dance, be tried for crimes as an adult, and.... wait a minute.... I didn't really want to do any of that stuff anyway.... geez, this sucks. Well, at least I can vote. And get into clubs. But I'm sure that will get boring. Oh well. I'll do my best to take advantage of my newfound freedoms. Oh yeah. I took a personality test and ended up INFP, or "Healer". Duh. It was right on target, and plus I feel special because only about 1% of the population falls into my category... yet somehow many of my close friends are INFP. How is this true? I have a theory that the INFP's sort of gravitate together, you know, artistics and intellectuals, etc. Makes sense. I'm going to try to write more. I always say that.